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They set themselves up for failure by looking for reasons why others couldn’t possibly like them or why they couldn’t improve, and wait for the Universe to deliver instead.
But your inexperience doesn’t of people treat dating like a game.
(That remaining 1 out of 10 has done you the favor of self-selecting out of your dating pool and you should be grateful that you don’t need to deal with them.) When you’re treating your lack of dates or sexual activity as a crime perpetuated against you by the universe, it makes you considerably less attractive to… If you dig into women’s about how they behave and the attitudes they had towards themselves, towards women and towards relationships. There’s two ways that making excuses doesn’t help you.
First and foremost is trying to rationalize away your inexperience.
This is just as true with a lack of dating experience as it is with other areas in life. Many people who have no dating or sexual experience worry about being a bad kisser or a bad lay or not knowing how affectionate to be in public or any of a myriad insecurities and anxieties.
Having little (or no) experience has nothing to do with who you are as a person; it’s a contextless data point in your life. But No matter how many partners we’ve had or haven’t had, we all come to a new relationship not knowing the other person’s likes and dislikes.
Just because the last 40 women you made out with liked the Swirly-Go-Round doesn’t mean that it’s not going to make your partner’s skin crawl. Do your research where you can (here’s a great place to start…), take some risks, make some mistakes.
Great sex isn’t about technique, it’s about comfort and familiarity. Letting your inexperience be your excuse for not trying or expecting someone else to always lead isn’t going to do you any good.
For many men, especially as they get older, dating inexperience is a vicious catch-22.If you venture into any Forever Alone or incel community like /r9k/, you’ll see hundreds of people lamenting how much sex they’ve never had and how the world is conspiring against them.That’s not taking ownership of being socially inexperienced; that’s making it the core of your identity and letting it overtake your life.The assumption is that women (because this is almost always a hetero male issue) will date a man who can rock their worlds and a virgin has no chance of pleasing her.And once he does, she will spread the word through the Cute Girl Network and ensure he’s blacklisted from all sexual activities in the future.